Edward Kennedy

Edward Kennedy died last night. Despite his many flaws, he always fought for those less fortunate, and for that I will be eternally grateful.

In December, while receiving an honorary degree at Harvard, he stated, “We know the future will outlast all of us, but I believe that all of us will live on in the future we make,” he said. “I have lived a blessed time.”

These is certainly a sentiment worth remembering, as I will be on Friday as I start teaching again.

Goodbye, Senator, and thank you.

Why I'm No Longer a Fundamentalist Christian - Part I: The Beginning

Awhile ago I decided to start writing a series of posts detailing serious and not-so-serious reasons why I am no longer a fundamentalist Christian. I hope this will not simply be an exercise of self-analysis, but will also speak to larger issues of extremism, conformity, and identity processes, among other sociology-related topics.

So, to start, I will tell you the context in which I came to be a fundamentalist Christian, which seems a necessary background to the objective of explaining why I am no longer a fundamentalist Christian. I blame it on sixth grade, but I don't want to get too ahead of myself.

I did not grow up particularly religious. Although my mother occasionally took me and my little sister to church, it was always to liberal congregations (i.e., Congregational, Unitarian, United Methodist, Presbyterian).* And her main reason for taking us to church was not because she was worried about our souls going to eternal damnation if we weren't "saved," but because she thought that Christianity had some good lessons to teach (seriously, who doesn't think The Golden Rule is useful both individually and socially?).

My mother herself would probably be classified as agnostic, but this is somewhat tricky. The last time we talked about this, she believed that a man named Jesus lived (or at least someone thought he did), and he did good works. But she has never believed Jesus was the son of god, or that people have to take Jesus into their hearts to be saved from the fiery pits of Hell. And I'm not sure she even believes that there is a god anymore, but I think she did when we were little.** So I'll classify her as agnostic for lack of a better category.

My father, who grew up an actively participating Quaker (so active that he was able to legitimately claim alternative service status during the Vietnam War - he served as a hospital orderly), has been a self-proclaimed agnostic as long as I can remember. I'm not really sure why he stopped believing in god (if he ever did), but I think his young-adult experiences turned him away from any sort of organized religion - add to this that he is a medical doctor and scientist at heart. My father seems content in his agnosticism, and has never done anything I've seen to try to get beyond not knowing; it just doesn't seem to be an important enterprise for him.

As you can see, I did not grow up highly religious, or highly spiritual for that matter. I did grow up learning the value of curiosity and education.

But sixth grade was BAD,*** and my sister was also not having the time of her life in public school. Living in a relatively rural location, my parents had one option - a private, fundamentalist Christian school. I think they reasoned that the potential benefits outweighed the potential costs. After all, wouldn't Christian children be nicer than public school children? In addition, they let us make our own decision about which school to attend. And we wanted to go to the private school.****

So we matriculated into a school where Bible class became integrated into our daily curriculum, along with Math, Science, Language Arts, and Social Studies. Into a school where most of the children believed in a different reality from our previous reality, a reality that included Evil and Good constantly warring against one another - there was never any room for grey. And, lo and behold, we both eventually bought into it. But that is a post for another day.

*All four of these congregations range from fairly to extremely liberal in California. United Methodism in Georgia is a much different animal, as I will probably discuss in a future post.

**It's funny how a bunch of adverse conditions that never seem to relent can make one question their faith in a loving god who is watching out for each of us. Hmm...

***In retrospect, I have come to understand that middle school is bad for everybody, regardless of where you fall on the stratification hierarchy, but how was I supposed to understand that then? I just knew that every day hurt emotionally.

****I truly think this was a big mistake on my parents' part, although I am quite cognizant that they were doing the best they could. But think about it...my sister and I were 9 and 11 - hardly old enough to make what would become a very huge decision in our lives.

Should we be asking students for their opinions?

I'm using a new reader this fall, and it has helpful "Questions to Consider" at the beginning of every reading. I LOVE this kind of thing, but I'm finding that most of the questions ask students for their opinions, rather than to recall information from the reading, or apply the information to another domain, etc. My main concern is that sociology (especially classes focusing on inequality) is often about showing students where their opinions end and good science begins, so I typically shy away from such opinion-based questions. Sometimes I will start with opinion questions, but I quickly steer the discussion towards empirically-based assertions (or try to).

I'd be curious to know what other teachers do. Do you start with opinion-based questions? Do you avoid them at all costs? And, if you do use opinion-based questions, how do you steer your students towards thinking about the sociology behind the topic at hand?

The Problem with Chex Mix

The problem with Chex Mix is that although it may contain 60% less fat than potato chips, it still contains fat, and is still not the most healthy food around.

Back in the day (college), I was way more strict with myself about food. I wouldn't buy chips (although I did go through a pita chip phase during grad school). I would limit myself to one sweet thing a day. This lasted until a very stressful phase in grad school where I dropped to 124 lbs., and my doctor commanded me to eat more per day (this is when the pita chip obsession began - also my love of bagels with a TON of cream cheese on them). I ended up gaining back the weight, due to my wonderful husband's love, not the food. But I never went back to my strict policies with myself.

Which is unfortunate, because, while at a game night two weekends ago, the hosts offered us Chex Mix. Never before have I enjoyed Chex Mix so much. And now a bag of it is sitting in the pantry, calling to me, singing me its siren snacking song.

Must...have...willpower.

Props to Avril Lavigne and Howie Day

...and a shout out to minor contributions from Dave Matthews' Band, Keane, and Billy Joel for helping me complete two successful months on the elliptical machine 3X/week for 30 minutes at a time.

After the asthma nightmare that lasted for months last summer and fall, I'm happy to be back doing more than walking the dog around our hilly neighborhood. And my lungs are feeling healthy and strong.

Woo-hoo health! And bring on the pollen!!!

Equality

This morning my husband and I were talking about the CA supreme court's decision yesterday to uphold the legal status of marriage as a union between a man and a woman. And then the topic shifted to gay marriage more generally.

We both agree that gay marriage should be legal as marriage between a man and a woman is legal, but for slightly different reasons. His philosophy is that a plethora of issues should be legal unless there's a compelling reason for them not to be. Thus, since he can't see how letting two men or two women marry would hurt society, he is not opposed to gay marriage. In contrast, he would be opposed to marriage between adults and children, because there's a compelling argument that such an arrangement would cause undue harm to the children in question. For me, it's about equality; if I get the right to marry the person of my choosing (who happens to be straight), then I believe everyone else should get the right to marry the person of their choosing. Our arguments are very similar, and obviously come to the same conclusion. Additionally, I don't think either of our arguments are necessarily tied directly to the issue of gay marriage. For my husband, if actions are not hurting society, then they should be legal (whatever those actions are); for me, if I'm legally allowed to do something (whatever that something is), then others should also have the right.

I think opponents of gay marriage are also seeing a larger picture behind this particular issue. Their arguments may revolve around the definition of marriage as being between a man and a woman, but the driving force of such sentiment is about god's will. So again, the particular issue doesn't matter (it could be gay marriage, abortion, etc.), but whether the outcome fits within god's will does.

As someone who grew up in California, and attended a fundamentalist Christian school for two years while I lived there, I am not surprised that there is so much disagreement about gay rights in the state. Not all Californians are the same. There's extremely liberal regions in CA, and extremely conservative regions. It's a huge state, and there's bound to be severe disagreements.

What strikes me as more interesting than debates within CA are the three states where gay marriage has been legalized: Maine, Vermont, and Iowa (please correct me if my information is incomplete). We're not talking about states with large urban centers (traditional hotbeds of liberalism)...we're talking about states with large rural populations. So what is going on here?

My first response was to claim something about the culture of the Northeast (where quite a few other states have given legal rights to same-sex civil unions). Perhaps the ideals of two important religious traditions in the Northeast (Quakerism and Unitarian Universalism) supporting equal rights for all people have infused the general culture to a great enough extent that the populations are willing to push for equal marriage rights. But this leaves me not understanding Iowa. I confess I haven't spent much time in the Midwest, but I was somewhat shocked when Iowa legalized gay marriage. Is there a similar tradition (perhaps based on religion, or otherwise) of equal rights in Iowa? Or is Iowa the outlier to the pattern we've seen in the Northeast (and to a limited extent in the Northwest)? What do you think?

Growth

I have always believed that the person you marry should challenge you to be your best self, and to grow and change when necessary.

Through knowing my husband for the past eight years, there are numerous ways I have grown, but today I'm reminded of how my views of the military have changed.

I grew up hearing stories about the huge fights my mother and father used to have with her family about the Vietnam War. My mother and my father, who grew up Quaker and did alternative service during Vietnam, did not believe in the war. In contrast, Uncle Jack (my mother's oldest brother), had enlisted in the Navy when he was 17 (I'm not sure how), had served in WWII, and was then serving in Vietnam. My Uncle Sonny (my mother's middle brother) had served in Korea as a radio technician, and my Uncle Jim (her younger brother) was drafted to serve in Vietnam as an airplane mechanic.

Although I knew that all three of my uncles had been in the military, I always leaned more towards my father's views of war. In fact, since I didn't believe in war as a good outcome to conflict, it didn't occur to me to think of the soldiers as separate from war, until I met my husband.

My husband, who has no family members in the military, but whose best friend was in the Marine Corps for quite a few years, has a tremendous sense of gratitude for the service of military personnel. This gratitude may be the result of growing up male and being a history buff, both of which have exposed him to the awful realities of war. Whatever the source of his gratitude, my husband has helped me to separate the wars from the individuals, and that has helped me to grow.

I still do not fundamentally believe in war as a solution to political problems (although I do realize its necessity, from time to time), I have come to have a deep appreciation for the men and women who serve in the armed forces. I may not understand why they choose to join the military, or endorse their beliefs (especially the ones who join because they want to further god's will), but they all put their lives on the line for their country, and for that I have immense respect.

On Saturday, my husband and I shook hands with two veterans collecting donations for the Veterans of Foreign Wars Foundation. I'll admit, it was hard for me to step beyond my revulsion for war and thank them, but it was worth it.